My body is yours
by ldngleek
Summary: Santana returns home and meets up with her first love Brittany S. Pierce (Brittana reunion - mature readers only; also apologies for the your/you're typo in the fic - I feel dirty :/ but can assure you I do know the difference!)
1. Absence

"It was really great to see you again", Santana said looking at Brittany back home in the Lima Bean, where it all began all those years ago.

"Yes it was, it's nice to be able to hang out just like before. I've missed you San"

"Me too Britt"

It was different for sure, meeting up for the first time since their emotional goodbye back in the choir room a few months previously but it was a good different. The awkward few minutes at first exchanging pleasantries over their lattes was soon replaced with a proper catch up, discussing Santana's new college life and Brittany regaling her with the latest Cheerios and New Directions gossip. They were still trying to find the appropriate boundaries for the new phase of their relationship, that of amicable exes, but it was difficult when each was so relaxed in the others presence. And still totally attracted to one another.

The pair grabbed their coats ready to leave. Brittany had been shopping beforehand so was overladen with bags.

"Let me walk you home, you definitely need a hand with them" Santana said.

"Okay, Lord Tubbington has missed you so would love to say hi – I think he may have his poker league tonight so he may not be in though but my parents will be back shortly after so you can see them too".

Santana smiled, she had missed her best friend, of course she knew her first love had moved on (with Trouty Mouth of all people) but it was nice to just be with her and spend time together, even if that could only ever be as friends. Out of habit (and somehow despite the heavy bags) they managed to link pinkies. It was comforting but the minimal contact that had sent a shock though them both. The smallest human interaction that meant so much, heat rising up to their faces they pulled apart

"Let's get you home then!"

They chatted some more on the way back, apparently Mr Schue was happy in Washington, the human potato was the new Schue and Blaine the new Rachel. Britt opened the door and invited Santana in, after a fruitless search for Lord Tubbington Santana said her goodbyes and was about to leave.

She lingered in the corridor as she headed to the door.

The former lovers shared a goodbye hug that went on just a tad too long neither wanting to break away first or let the moment end. Santana took a reluctant step back and looked at Brittany, really looked at her as if she was searching her soul. She had always loved her piercing blue eyes and would often lay in bed for hours just looking at her and wondering how she was so lucky to find her best friend and soul mate in a dump like Lima. The eyes that once were filled with so much hope now looked hesitant and unsure. She moved a strand of hair from Brit's face, just like she used to and started to kiss her neck, meeting no resistance and with the hesitancy ebbing away, Brittany closed her eyes. Rather than pulling away as Santana expected, the blondes breath hitched at this contact and pulled her closer, wrapping her hands round her perfect ass.

Santana traced a line of kisses over Brittany's collarbone, slightly pulling at the loose vest Brit was wearing, it had been teasing her all afternoon, the one flimsy barrier between her and the lacy black bra that encased her breasts. The bra left little to the imagination showing her enough of the pert breasts that were underneath, the flesh that she had missed so much in the past couple of months. Santana snaked her hand up Brittany's top and under her bra to gently take one of her nipples in her hand. As she gently brushed her fingers against it Brittany broke away from their passionate kiss and whispered in her ear

"I want you"

This is all Santana needed to hear, and wanted to hear since their separation. She felt her heart tighten and got even wetter, the woman she loved still wanted her and was here, now, in front of her.

Brittany was still pinned against the wall as Santana moved her hand away from her breast towards her waistband. She slipped her hand in between the dancers skirt and her bare midriff, feeling her taut stomach as she reached down, not daring to break their kiss. She wanted to consume Brittany, she had waited so long for this moment, imagined it so often on the lonely nights away from home in her dorm room and now it was really happening. She never wanted it to end, she needed to commit it all to memory, the feeling of how wet Brittany was; a sign of how much she wanted her, the taste of her lip balm with a hint of the bubble gum that she perpetually chewed, the sound of the empty house only broken by what she imagined to be her beating heart and the encouraging groans that she elicited from the love of her life.

Santana had always loved the feeling of how wet Brittany got as she put her fingers near her tight pussy. In one careful stroke she swiped from Brittany's pussy upwards, and slightly brushed against her clit as if by accident before immediately moving her hand and starting the whole process again. She wanted to savour this moment but was acutely aware that Brittany's parents were due back any moment and currently she was fucking their daughter in the hall way of their house. This thought turned her on even more and almost pushed Santana over the edge. It seemed that suddenly Brittany had remembered of their imminent return too.

"Fuck. Santana that's so good" she panted "but my parents…"

Santana silenced her concerns with another kiss, their tongues dancing in their familiar rhythm, passionate, full of love and the comfort of familiarity. Santana playfully nipped Brittany's lip with her teeth

"don't worry, just relax"

she said as she plunged two fingers into Brit's pussy. Slowly she began drawing them in and out but then picking up the pace as she saw how responsive Brittany was, pushing her hips further forward to get the whole feeling of Santana inside her. Santana needed to feel how much Brittany wanted her so she moved her hand to focus all of her attention onto her hard, enlarged clit.

"oh your so wet baby"

"mmm… you make me this wet. It's all for you"

was all that Brittany could reply before she almost completely fell apart as Santana made circling motions on her clit. She always knew how to make Brittany's body react in the best ways so the constant changes of pressure and the juxtaposition of Santana's svelte fingers pumping inside her compared to rubbing her clit like now when combined with her long absence and the danger of the return of her parents - or worse Lord Tubbington - made the feelings even more intense.

Santana continued to alternate between rubbing the hard clit and putting her fingers inside Brittany, hitting her g spot. Santana could sense that Brittany was close to coming as she scrunched her face up and started to slightly moisten her lips with her tongue. She found it harder to move her fingers as Brit's pussy started to clench against them…God, she had missed that feeling.

As her eyes were closed Santana took the opportunity to study the beauty of the woman in front of her. She loved the honesty of her face how she completely let go and yielded her body to Santana. When they were together before Brittany always said to Santana "my body is yours" and she didn't realise how true this was or how much she needed her body until it was taken away.

Now it was like coming home. Santana truly believed she was doing right by Brittany when they broke up, she was releasing her to love again but they never stopped loving each other. And when they were apart it wasn't just a friend or lover that was missing, it was like a part of them had been taken away. And the worst thing was that Santana had caused this. Brittany was the first thing that popped into Santana's head in the morning and the last thing she thought of at night. When she closed her eyes Santana saw Brittany, in bed she dreamt of Brittany, when she touched herself to forget her loneliness it was Brittany she imagined. It had always been Brittany and always would be. To distract herself from these morose feelings she kissed Brittany even deeper, willing her to feel how much love she felt in that moment. Each movement she made was a tribute to Brittany, "I love you, I love you" she thought, "please, love me back – please, forgive me".

She moved her hand one last time to the enlarged, pulsating clit knowing what was needed to do to push Brittany over the edge.

"Come for me baby" she seductively whispered into the blondes ear, "I want you to come all over my hand, I just wish we had enough time to fuck in your bedroom then you could come in my mouth"

At this Brittany suddenly jerked her hips and gripped her hands even harder into Santana's shoulders before coming undone. As she fulfilled Santana's wish, Santana smiled. She loved providing Brittany with so much pleasure and getting such enthusiastic responses.

"That. Was. Fantastic" Brit panted as she came down – holding onto Santana for support, " I fucking love you touching me. And I love you".

Santana hugged Brittany tighter "I am glad that you enjoyed it and I love you too, and I am sorry about everything"

"Shhhh baby, none of that matters now".

Santana went to wash up before she had to reluctantly leave and caught sight of herself in the mirror, she was flushed and seemed to be smiling for the first time in months. Brittany had this effect on her; only Brittany could make Santana feel this – content. She knew that she had to leave at that moment as her face would betray to Brit's parents what they had been doing that afternoon and Santana would be too distracted reliving the touching and how hard Britt had come. As she exited the bathroom she gave Brittany one final kiss and they made plans to meet again and have a proper talk.


	2. Alone

When Santana got home she text Brittany to say thanks for the coffee and they agreed to meet up and discuss what happened between them the next day. But tomorrow could not come quickly enough for either of them.

Santana could not sleep that night; she was so distracted by everything. What did it all mean?

She kept replaying the moments of their time together…

_Taking the bags to Brittany's._

_Standing next to her door about to leave. _

_Something pulling her back._

_The longing._

_The love._

_Kisses on her neck._

_Brittany wanting her so desperately._

_Watching her come… _

It had all started off so innocently but descended into one of their hottest encounters yet (and they had shared a few hot encounters!)

'Focus Santana!' she scolded herself as she could feel her panties getting drenched with her own desire.

She needed to work out a proper plan of action. Yes she loved Brit there was no denying that, that had never changed but nothing else had either. The reasons that they parted still existed now. Brittany had her life in Lima and Santana was trying to forge her own one in Louisville.

Of course it was an adjustment and she would long for her first love and feelings back home. It's only natural, she reasoned, but Santana didn't want to mess Brittany around again, she couldn't do that to the blonde if she truly loved her. She had Trouty Mouth now (but Santana considered him be collateral damage in the scenario like Wheels and all of the other stupid boys before him).

Maybe love was enough despite the distance. Love was enough to help Santana with her coming out. Maybe they could be the exception and buck the trend - maybe they were different?

The internal battle of realism and optimism raged on. There was always Skype to keep them entertained in the times away… Santana's mind started to wander again as dirty thoughts clouded her thinking.

_The feeling of Brittany clenching when Santana's fingers were inside her. _

"Oh, Brittany…"

Santana slid her hand down her body and pushed her soaked panties to the side. She was already so wet as began touching herself, all the time thinking of Brittany. She inserted two fingers into her dripping pussy with ease. Moving in and out softly at first she then increased the friction and went harder, groaning at the contact. She would much prefer it if it was Brittany touching her instead but she had always been able to get herself off when the need arose.

As she moved her hand to her clit she pictured Brittany, her contorted face when she was about to orgasm in the hallway, and what she had said – "come for me baby". And she did. Santana increased the pressure on her slick clit, hungry for more contact. As she reached the edge she bit down on her lip - the delicious combination of pleasure and pain. A lot like love.

It didn't take her long to come as she had so much pent up sexual energy and finally she managed to fall into a deep sleep, smiling and looking forward to the day ahead.


	3. Hope

Morning arrived and Santana woke from her peaceful slumber. She felt wet still so must have been dreaming about Brittany again - but instead of waking up frustrated as usual she was excited for the day ahead and the possibilities that came with it. Her and Brit were in the same zip code again (albeit temporarily) so they should make the most of the time they had together before she returned to college. Also touching herself the night before helped, ahem, relieve her inner tension somewhat and definitely set her up in a good mood for the rest of the day.

As she remembered the craziness of her time back home so far a second wave of arousal washed over her. She was tempted to have a repeat performance of last night, her hand hovering over her naked, exposed pussy but she decided against it as she realised the time. She had slept in and had lots of errands to run in anticipation of meeting up with Brittany as well as a Lopez family reunion to navigate first, _shit_.

Santana was happy to see her relatives again, especially her abuela who was now happy that her little garbage face was apparently happy in Louisville, a Card cheerleader no less, despite her rampant homosexuality. She may not have been totally approving of this 'lifestyle' choice but she was nowhere near as hostile as before so it was progress at least. But all the time she was being asked about college life, and if there were any special lady friends in Louisville, she was thinking about what she left behind in Lima, and how she could get it back…

Brit had a certain honour when it came to men despite her feelings for Santana. She could be dating a man and fucking Santana at the same time (due to the different plumbing) but when it came down to it she had hurt her and needed to regain her trust. Santana had dated Trouty Mouth many moons ago and knew he was a good guy and would have Brit's best intentions at heart but so did she. In her twisted logic that is part of the reason why she broke up with her in the first place. To avoid it in the long run, before they could properly hurt and eventually hate each other. She needed to show her that it wasn't just about sex (although the sex was amazing!), they belonged together in body and soul. She may have acted like the hard super bitch cheerleader and was most famous in McKinley for her brutal verbal smack downs (before the sex tape and the whole gay thing that is) but Brit was one of the only people to see her vulnerable side like when she sang 'Songbird' to her in the choir room. Luckily Santana's parents would be away that evening so she would have the house to herself to prove to Brittany how much she really did care.

After the reunion Santana and Brittany had agreed to meet for a milkshake. Brit always enjoyed them and chose her favourite, the extravagant double chocolate oreo whip with extra chocolate and extra whip, plus sprinkles – rainbow naturally. They laughed and joked, neither wanting to break the bubble of happiness by mentioning the day before despite how much they wanted and needed to. Santana wiped away the 'Got milk' moustache from Brit's face. Brittany grasped Santana's hand as it was near her mouth and placed a light kiss on her fingertips. They locked eyes.

_"Shall we go back to mine and, errr watch a dvd and erm maybe talk?"_ Santana stumbled losing all composure _"Smooth, huh?"_

_"Yes, it can be like a sleepover. Remember our sleepovers San? It's a shame Quinn isn't around still. She is probably having sleepovers with Rachel in New York."_ Brittany replied.

Oh yes Santana remembered their infamous sleepovers, after Cheerios practice, at cheer camp, when Santana's parents were working late (which was quite often). She remembered the anticipation, counting down the days until she would be sleeping in the same room as her best friend, sharing secrets, talking about boys (she laughed at the thought now!), waiting for the other girls to fall asleep so they could practise kissing… for boys of course. And as they got older practising a whole lot more. Even Quinn joined their sessions a few times. Making out under the cover of darkness, quietly so no one else would wake up, groping and tugging at training bras, the thrill and fear of getting caught, knowing that it wasn't quite right but justifying it as 'practise'. Practise makes perfect after all. They had progressed a lot from their teenage fumbles to fully fledged love and passion.

She thought back to one particular occasion that always stuck in her mind. For Santana it was the game changer, when it was no longer practise for the boy that she would love in the future but was making love to the person she did love at that moment in time and always would, Brittany.

It was a quiet night when they were about 15, their sessions had been going on for around a year for that time. They were inseparable both in and out of class. Brittany's parents were out of town so Santana went over to keep her company. She remembered the words of her parents so vividly, _"remember no boys are allowed over!"_, ha there certainly would be no chance of that.

They had watched a movie and ate ice cream then thoughts turned to other things, their practise. Brit had already taken her top off during the film and had shimmied over to Santana as soon as the credits started to roll. Brittany went to kiss Santana but she stopped her and looked straight at the blonde. Brittany was self-conscious thinking that she had ice cream on her face, and then panicked - maybe her parents were unexpectedly home early or Lord Tubbington was filming them again. But it was none of these; Santana just wanted a moment of them, together.

It was like for the first time she realised the beauty of the girl in front of her that was developing into a woman, the one person that knew all her secrets – or all of them but one. The one secret she wished she could share with the most important person to her but the one that could potentially break their friendship. That she like girls in the way that she was meant to like boys and that she was in love - with her.

That night something had changed, it was unspoken but everything felt different afterwards. That night (and for the rest of the weekend) they didn't fuck, they make love and it was the first time Santana went down on Brittany. For once it felt real and honest, Brittany did not know the secret but as Santana had revealed it to herself and slowly began to accept the fact that she was in love with a girl some of the guilt she had been feeling fell away.

Discovering and exploring each other's bodies in detail, they were almost a proper couple for that one blissful weekend. Best friends and lovers. But Santana believed that sort of love could not survive in Lima, that was what she had grown up being told and that is why she fought it so hard for so long. But now as an adult she realised that it could survive, and that was the hope she clung onto.

At Santana's house Brittany plopped down on a chair by the dvd rack and started flicking through the collection whilst the Latina was in the kitchen fixing the popcorn.

_"What do you want to watch San?"_

_"Anything you fancy…"_ she replied, _"…but not…"_

It was too late, Brit had already put 'Bring it On' in the player, a movie they had watched together a million times before (and Santana a million times alone, Missy – enough said) and could recite backwards, cheer routines and all.

_"Really?"_ Santana said with faux exasperation; throwing a towel at Brittany, narrowly missing her head. She tried to suppress a giggle. It was also the film they had watched when Santana first knew that she loved Brittany, all those years ago.

"_Yes really",_ Brittany moved over to the couch, _"now bring that popcorn over here, we are getting our spirit fingers on"_

Santana awkwardly laughed at the implication, she sure hoped so!

On the couch the pair snuggled as they watched the film. Santana lazily drew circles on Brit's arm, an annoying habit, she always had to keep her hands occupied with something, even when asleep. She was so engrossed in the film that she didn't realise Brittany had sat up and was staring at her.

Suddenly she lunged at the shocked brunette and pounced into a passionate kiss. It was primal in its want. Teeth grazed lips, tongues clashed; greedy to consume the other, fighting over territory, explorative - it was like their first time all over.

Brittany had missed Santana as much as Santana had missed Brittany, or even more she thought. The break-up had been completely unexpected as she was ever the optimist and although she had found comfort with Sam nothing could deny the chemistry that she shared with San. They went together like peanut butter and jelly – you could never have one without the other… and you would always go back for more.

_"I broke up with him you know"_

Santana felt that hope again, the doubts faded away, they could make it work – it would work. Like all those years ago, Santana stopped Brittany in her tracks and just looked at her.

_"I have something to show you"_ was all she managed to reply before she gave Brittany a tender kiss on her forehead and pulled herself away from the couch.


	4. Belonging

_"Now wait there and do not come in until I say so"_ Santana said, reluctantly letting go of Brit's hand and heading towards the door leaving her on the couch with their dvd still playing in the background and discarded popcorn on the floor.

_"Err okay"_ was all she could reply, even more confused than usual.

Brit wondered what Santana could be up to - she couldn't really hear much movement. She hadn't seen Santana acting this… _nervous_… around her unless she was reluctantly revealing her vulnerability or sneaking around planning a surprise. Maybe they would have a treasure hunt like they did that time on their unofficial first anniversary, when Santana spent weeks and weeks preparing for the ultimate romantic extravaganza! She collected all of Brit's favourite things and placed them in special locations where they had shared dates or had kissed, with cute little poems leading her from one place to another.

Dots were hidden at the bleachers where they used to hang out at their recess during school, hiding from Coach Sue and her rampages or the other Cheerios so they could get their mack on.

In her glove compartment there was a shell that Santana had collected at a beach on a trip away with Brit's family. They used to love going for long drives to places where no one knew them, they could be a proper couple – singing songs in the car, walking down the street holding hands; they had so much freedom beyond the constraints of Lima – they always collected a little memento to remind them of the place they had visited.

The hunt eventually accumulated in dinner at Breadstix, where they had their first proper date as more than just friends the year before. After they had shared a dessert they went back to Brittany's and made love. A quiet kind of love compared to their usual escapades as her parents were still in. It was sensual, the quietness heightened their other senses so they felt every touch and caress with an increased sensitivity. It was incredibly difficult at times to keep silent when they were giving each other so much pleasure.

The thought back to that night made her get even wetter, Brit was already massively turned on from sitting so close to Santana during the movie and having her touching her, however innocently. Santana was always such a tease, the simmering tension, the touching – she knew how to make her come, the anticipation of the massive orgasm always left her wanting more. But Brittany could give plenty back and knew how to make Santana moan and beg too. She could be a tease when necessary, like the time they went for dinner then to the movies and Brittany had forgotten to put on underwear.

Throughout the meal Santana was so frustrated and wanted to take Brit home straight away but she made her wait, well wait until they had gotten into the car at least. It was a frantic, desperate fuck, Brittany was driving so Santana leant over from the passenger seat and slipped her fingers under her skirt to her wet, inviting pussy. Brit found it hard to concentrate on the road ahead and it was quite an awkward angle despite San's skills so it was deemed sensible to pull over as soon as possible and practise safe sex. They stopped at a dimly lit road and as soon as the engine cut Brittany had moved over and straddled her. They rocked against one another finding an awesome rhythm that made them both come almost one after the other; "_so hot_" – Brittany thought.

Santana told Brittany she loved her afterwards, She liked hearing those words but the actions that came with it made them even more special. The single hand-picked flower left in her locker when she was feeling down, the sweet good morning texts, drawing funny pictures and making up goofy songs.

She loved Santana, the good parts and the not so good but this was the Santana she loved the most. The girl who was so strong but also had a loyal, thoughtful gentle side for those lucky enough to see it. Santana saw vulnerability as a weakness, that is what her abuela had raised her to believe but Brittany didn't, it was what made her even stronger and more beautiful.

Santana was still doing whatever she was doing so Brit decided to use the time she had alone to work out how she actually was feeling rather than what she was feeling before or when they were fucking. Right now at this very moment in time she felt… _content_. She was happy that she was no longer hiding from Sam. It was sad having to tell him, how broken he seemed but at the same time how he just took it, '_inevitable' _was the word he used, Brit much preferred '_intrinsic'. S_he wasn't good with words so didn't know if she was using it right as Lord Tubbington has taught her it, but they were intrinsically bound. Her and San were inescapably linked forever, their _hearts_ were pinky linked.

But Santana had broken her heart. And she knew that she risked heartbreak again. San had her new life in Louisville and didn't need dumb Brit, her high school sweetheart who couldn't even graduate first time, dragging her down and keeping her back from all that she could achieve. The last few months had been hell for Brit, the one being left behind, she felt abandoned. She wanted to smile again, and Sam provided that, with him it was easy. But love isn't meant to be easy, that would be boring and means you don't love enough. A relationship needs balance, the good and the bad, compromise, laughter and love. San and Brit got each other, it was as if they were the only people that could really, truly appreciate the other for what they were. San never made Brit feel stupid and Brit would be able to calm Santana down from one of her vicious, vicious tirades. They belonged together.

_"It's ready, you can come in now"_ Santana called from the other room.

Brittany was bought back from her thoughts, yes - they did belong together, it was intrinsic (_maybe?_ She would have to ask lord Tubbington what it meant again when she got home).

All she did know was that they always had loved each other and always would.


End file.
